The Sexuality Temptation, Stabilizing Hormones and the Noggin

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating predicament and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and guys utilize love to get sex." This is a excellent summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap is similar to the Love Trap, where singles analyze excellent sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further because for these songs, having sex carries immense significance and consequences.

Songs fall into the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two methods:

A.they think sex is a needed test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will ready also).

B.more commonly, all consciousness heads out the window, and one or both previously level-headed singles consider themselves a committed couple as quickly as they have sex.
So, instead of looking at whether this other person may be a match on levels besides physical tourist attraction-- such as long-term requirements, requirements, and wants-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to stay connected with reality when all those hormonal agents are cutting loose. Our body responds to somebody we are attracted to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone (increases libido), that makes the chance to make love with somebody we are brought in to click to investigate incredibly tough to withstand. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), which makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chemical responses are involuntary and strong , leading to effective feelings of attraction, excitement, closeness, love, and well-being .

When issues emerge, those who fall into the Sex Trap frequently rationalize by thinking, "Well, we've got issues, but the sex is great!" They most likely wouldn't confess it, but they focus on physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their main hunting tools are sexual tourist attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mainly with gay men, states that many of his customers have fallen under the Sex Trap.

" For gay guys check my source especially in cities, sex is readily offered, which in itself is a trap," North says. "In addition, the culture, with its focus on physical look, motivates sexual activity. If a prospective partner is going to be sexually suitable, many gay guys desire to find out from the beginning. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to ready?".

Nevertheless, North adds, "I believe this is a 'guy' thing instead of a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to mention that chemistry is crucial. Chemistry is a given that we can't manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry take place, though often it can grow over time.

Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry threat relationship failure when my link the hormone-induced intoxication wears off and truth hits.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you should balance your heart (and hormonal agents) with your head. This implies combining chemistry with common sense. While good sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you need to make your partner choices by paying full focus on your vision, goals, values, and requirements -- while feeling all those exciting stimulates!

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

Comments on “The Sexuality Temptation, Stabilizing Hormones and the Noggin”

Leave a Reply

Gravatar